Author: quistian

1) For some reason I’m reminded again of this nursing student friend I had some years ago. Young, pretty, but with a streak of rebellion in her. For a while she was able to get her act together after joining a group of people dedicated to serving the Lord through music. Got very active in the ministry, read her bible almost everyday, attended weekly devotions and even undertook voice training in an effort to serve better.

But then, there came a period when she had to spend a lot of time with her friends at school for a group project. Went on a lot of out-of-town trips that were partly business and partly pleasure. Ever vigilant, her friends at church gave her some precautionary talk about not spending any more time with this group than is necessary, or something like that. “I can handle it,” she answered. She was clearly having the time of her life, which was probably natural since she’s young and probably enjoying all kinds of new experiences with her new group of friends.

One day, over YM, she blurted at my wife “PUTANG-INA MO!!!”

2) Another friend, a pastor’s wife. Also totally dedicated to the Lord and her family. She was also very intelligent, headstrong, and an overachiever, the type that wouldn’t let go of an anything without doing something substantial first. A woman who values her career almost as much as she does her family, she excelled at her job and made a lot of important friends in the business. Invested a lot of herself, time and effort into her career and met all sorts of people. At the same time, she tried to spare some time for the ministry as well.

But things hadn’t been easy. She tried to serve two masters. Believed in her inherent ability to juggle two different worlds, both of which demanded a lot from her. But she clearly became immersed with only one, and she wound up pouring her heart to her career more than she probably should have.

Next thing I know, she was having an affair with a coworker.

3) Another story about a pastor. No details. Simply that this pastor thought that socializing and spending time with some of his female friends poses no danger since he’s confident with his spirituality. He ended up having an affair with one of them just the same.

4) Jimmy Swaggart. Nuff said.

All of the above happened a pretty long time ago. All of the people I mentioned had repented since then and become straight with God again.

But how many people did they cause to stumble before repenting? How many people did they hurt in the process?

Two verses come to mind:

“Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’ ” (1 Corinthians 15:33)

“So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall!” (1 Corinthians 10:12)

I don’t care how much you claim that you still attend regular devotions and bible studies. As long as you continue to expose yourselves to situations where you could fall, you will fall. This has already been proven by hundreds of Christians who thought they could deal with precarious situations and then find out when it’s too late that they couldn’t.  Take the hint already.

Parting Shot: Here’s a rather amusing story I read from Reader’s Digest:

A man put out an ad for a chauffeur at a local newspaper. Three experienced drivers responded to the ad. During the screening, the man asked two of the applicants to wait outside the room, and then asked the one applicant in the room a question.

“When driving on a road near a cliff, how far away from the ledge could you drive without falling off?”

“Five inches.” Proudly declared the first applicant.

The man then asked him to go out and tell the second applicant to come in. He then asked the second applicant the same question.

“Two inches.” He answered, grinning with cockiness.

As with the first, he told the second applicant to go out and call the third applicant. The man asked the same question.

“I’d stay as far away from the ledge as possible.” said the third applicant.

He got the job.

“But I know the rage that drives you. That impossible anger strangling the grief, until the memory of your loved one is just… poison in your veins. And one day, you catch yourself wishing the person you loved had never existed so you’d be spared your pain.”

-Â Henri Ducard (Liam Neeson), Batman Begins, 2005

After my brother died (car crash), my mom introduced me to one of her colleagues at work, a woman who was a little bit older than her. Then my mom told me about that colleague of hers, particularly her decision to be emotionally detached from her children. Why? So that she didn’t have to suffer from the intense grief as my mom (and dad) did as a result of my brother’s death.

Sounds kinda practical. Don’t let yourself get emotionally attached to anything and anyone so you’d suffer less pain if you lose them — and you will lose them. Squall Leonhart of Final Fantasy VIII had the same idea. “I don’t want friends who won’t be around tomorrow”, he said. If you don’t plan to stick around, I might as well keep you at arms length.

My mom disagrees. Yes, she hurt like hell when she lost her son. But according to her, the hurt is still worth it. She’d rather go through the painful consequences of loving than to play safe and, in the process, lead a life devoid of the joys of loving.

But you know, sometimes I’m with my mom’s colleague. And Squall.

The sting of losing someone is just not worth it.

Back in California, I had 10 credit cards. Ten. Four of them are unactivated, owing to my peculiar habit of sending credit card applications just for the heck of it (which falls under the same category of test-driving cars when I have no plans of buying – but that’s a story for another day). I used six – and as a result found myself deep into debt that for the life of me, I didn’t quite know how to settle.

Fortunately, that’s all behind me now. I’m back home, no credit cards, and I couldn’t be happier. Still, the temptation to apply still arises from time to time, especially when friends try to entice me to or when I walk into work and find bank representatives at the lobby of the building trying to sweet-talk me into availing of great deals, like no interest payment for 2 years and similar lures to taste “the good life.” I would then tell my wife about it, to which she would respond with a lecturing look while saying in her usual sweet manner, “Hon, do we really need it?”

We don’t. From the start, my wife and I promised that we would lead a simple life. We have a home, food on the table, and even a car to get around with, even if it’s not my dream Nissan Skyline GT-R. So again, wifey will prove right, and I would snap back to the plan.

There’s a reason for this, actually. If you think living simply and wisely is just the simpleton’s lame attempt to chicken out of the real world, take a gander at this:

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Question: “What does the Bible say about a Christian going into debt?”Answer: Paul’s charge to us to owe nothing but love in Romans 13:8 is a powerful reminder of God’s distaste for all forms of debt that are not being paid in a timely manner (see also Psalms 37:21). Usually we think of debt in terms of a monetary obligation. But in light of the context of this entire passage (Romans 13:1-10), Paul seems to have a broader view of debt in mind (Romans 13:7). Not only does he speak of taxes, tolls, and tariffs that are imposed on us by our government, but also the respect, honor and praise we owe to those in high authority. All of us are debtors to God’s grace. As He has shown us love, we need to extend love to those around us with whom we live and work – even those who tax and govern us.

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Not a rub against anyone, but maybe more of a friendly reminder. Having credit cards and taking out loans for whatever purpose you may have, it’s your call and I would never dream of encroaching into your freedom to do what you want. But as someone who used to be deep in debt and had learned a lesson from it, you might just want to take my counsel (more of my wife’s, really) and take the time to ask yourself first if you really need this something you’re getting yourself into debt for. Stopping to think might reveal a thing or two that might give you a pleasant surprise. Who knows, right?